Yom Kippur 5785

By Mindy Steinholz, WLCJ Finance Chair

Davening in Sneakers

“In a good shoe, I wear a size six, but a seven feels so good, I buy a size eight.” – Miss Truvy (Dolly Parton) in “Steel Magnolias”

When I was a girl, every fall brought new shoes. There were school shoes, sneakers, and of course the black Mary Jane-style shoes which I wore for the High Holidays. When I was turning 13 and my Bat Mitzvah was approaching, I wanted nothing more than a pair of high heels. Well, two pairs actually — one for the service on Friday night and one for the party on Saturday night. I felt so grown up when my mom took me to the regular (not kids) shoe store and we picked out my special shoes. I can laugh about the “heels” on them even though now they would certainly be too high for me. 

I got red pumps for my senior prom and wore white summer sandals for my graduation from high school and a different pair for my college graduation. When I got married, I picked out a pair of peau de soie kitten heels. I loved those shoes! I loved them so much I had them dyed to match the dress I wore when I was a bridesmaid at my sister’s wedding the following year.

I still have some beautiful shoes in my closet — the strappy low-heeled pair I wore when my daughter became a Bat Mitzvah. They hurt my feet terribly but I wanted to look nice that day. I have shoes from other weddings and special events. Last year, I finally got rid of my favorite black booties from my working days. Of course, I have the sparkly sneakers I wore after my daughter’s wedding ceremony so I could be more comfortable on the dance floor.

I still have several pairs of nice flats which I generally wore to Shabbat services pre-pandemic. But they just sit in the boxes or in the shoe rack. Since almost all of them are just gently worn, I know I should find a place to donate them. I don’t wear them anymore.  Over the last few years, I have had more and more foot issues.

Now, I almost only daven in sneakers. I used to wonder (when I was little) about the (mostly) men wearing sneakers on Yom Kippur. Now I know it is not the wearing of sneakers that is the goal but instead, it is to not wear shoes made of leather. Many people still wear their nice shoes. For years now, I have been davening in various canvas topsiders. It felt freeing to not have to worry about shoes for the holiday.

Now almost every Shabbat finds me in a pair of sneakers. I choose my clothes with care, making sure everything is nice and fresh, pick out my accessories with deliberateness (a “Bring Them Home Now” pendant almost always on a chain around my neck). But the sneakers, the sneakers are on my feet so I can make it down my steps to leave my home, so I can walk through the congregation passing out honors, and stand on the bimah for Torah service and to be gabbai.

I just got new sneakers in September. My rabbi heard about a place that really measured your feet and examined your gait to get you the right pair. I had been buying 7 1/2s, but on measuring, even an 8 was a bit small. So now I have a pair of size 9s. And yes, they will be on my feet when I daven throughout the holidays. I will be dressed in nice clothes (new dresses waiting in my closet), I will pick out meaningful accessories to wear, I will bring my tallitot (so I can wear whichever one suits the temperature in the sanctuary). And on my feet will be my new (better fitting) sneakers. 

Wishing all my sisters a Shabbat Shalom and a meaningful fast.

Shabbat Shalom,
Mindy Steinholz
WLCJ Finance Chair
msteinholz@wlcj.org