Instilling Jewish Customs and Rituals as a Convert

By Diane Mashioff, WLCJ Treasurer

In this week’s Torah portion, Shmini, God laid out the “laws of kashrut.”   Thirty-seven years ago, I decided to convert to Judaism and adopted the laws of kashrut (keeping a kosher home) and never looked back from my childhood upbringing. I married my beloved husband, Ben, in 1986, and raised two children, Ira and Leah. 

I made many trips to and from Hebrew school. Ira became a Bar Mitzvah in 2004 and Leah, a Bat Mitzvah in 2008. They both went onto Hebrew high school and were Confirmed, and attended JCC summer camp.  Leah continued to teach Hebrew school and the Junior Congregation at our shul in Cherry Hill, N.J. Hopefully I instilled in my two children the laws and the value of Jewish customs and rituals.

Born and raised as a Catholic, going to Catholic school until fourth grade (oldest of 6 children), that was the religion that I practiced. My father, a Lutheran who converted to Catholicism, married my mom, a Catholic. As I wrote this article, I observed his yahrzeit on the 29th of Adar. It wasn’t until his passing that I finally realized why he was always more accepting than my mom of my choice to convert to Judaism: It was because he was a convert too! There were little subtle things, but it was clear that he didn’t ever once question my choice.

As a family, we decided to participate in many of my family’s religious events and we invited them to participate in our Jewish traditions. But it was very clear to all that our children were being raised Jewish.

Recently, I joined over 40 sisters of WLCJ during Makom B’Yachad to say Kaddish for my dad.  Not only did I find comfort among all my sisters, we had a beautiful service and watched a lovely video for International Women’s Day. Had I not been a member of Women’s League, I would have not had this opportunity to partake in this religious ritual at my home.

While there is no formal requirement for a convert to say Kaddish for a non-Jewish parent, I wanted to show utmost respect for my dad and said Kaddish for one day less than 11 months to elevate his soul. It was my way of honoring him, and when my mom passes, I will do the same for her, too.

This week’s Torah portion begins with the consecration of the Mishkan, the sanctuary where the Israelites worshipped, and the establishment of a sacred space for divine presence among the people. The one thing I wish I could change is that if I were to make aliyah to Israel, I would not be recognized as being Jewish because of my Conservative conversion.  I would have to have an Orthodox conversion to be considered Jewish in Israel.  For me, once a Jew always a Jew, so that we all should be able to share the sacred space for divine presence no matter where we travel.

It’s an honor and thrill to serve as Women’s League for Conservative Judaism’s Treasurer for Julia Loeb’s administration. I look forward to seeing my kids get married under the chuppah and G-d willing someday to have grandchildren so my husband and I can be called zayde and bubbie, and so we can instill in them our strong Jewish customs and rituals.

L’dor va’dor!

Diane Mashioff
WLCJ Treasurer
dmashioff@wlcj.org